About me and my services

 I am a Christian Life Coach, a Professor of Biblical Studies, a future professionally licensed counselor, blogger and occasionally fill the pulpit. My specialties are in helping ministers/pastors with self-care and stress management and in helping college students/young adults find purpose in life. 
I am learning how to deal with stress and anxiety with CBT, mindfulness and relaxation techniques, coping skills, and  decision making  techniques.
 I have seen trauma, divorce, stress and personal loss and pain in my own life. I have been there.

I want to remove excuses for getting success you want over the phone, on Skype and face-to-face.
 I want to help people set realistically higher expectations, achieve more results and to live a better lifestyle.
I want you to  see success in life. I want to help grow and stretch you to new levels in your emotional, spiritual, intellectual and physical development.
I will provide and equip you with  tools use for the rest of your life as you continue to grow and learn.
I want to change the way you think about yourself. I believe that everyone has a ton of potential and the only thing standing in your way is your self. 
With me you will be able to see results in your life and you will gain tools and discover resources that you will be able to use in the future.

For a free  consultation to see if coaching with me is a good fit  for you check out AlexanderDolin.com for more information.


Take One Step at a Time

When you are feeling anxious, stressed out, hopelessoverwhelmed or down, there is some hope. While these feelings  can very quickly overtake you if you’re not careful. Here are 2 simple Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) based technique that can help face your fears and anxieties. 

The first activity is to dispute negative thoughts. Here are some questions to help in this stage of the of the A.B.C.D. Method:
1.What's the worst that could happen? 2.How likely is it to actually happen? 3.Even if the worst DID happen - how could you cope with it?

This last question begins the process of the second CBT intervention, facing your fears:
Planning out each step, is an essential part of this intervention. The key is to break the fear down into numbered small steps. CBT Therapists often help the client to place the most frightening action steps  at the bottom  and the least frightening at the top of the list.  
Next the clinician helps the client work through their list, taking each step in the order listed. The client only moves to the next step when they have really achieved the previous one.
While important, merely achieving a step once  is not enough. Clients must keep going over each step until they are confident and comfortable achieving this step. The counselor  helps the client achieve progress and congratulate/encourage the client in their success. Celebrating every achievement – even the seemingly small ones, will help to build your confidence in the face of the fear. 
As the client works through the list, they’ll begin to notice strength growing and fear diminishing. It might feel uncomfortable but it’s worth it.

If you like these types of activity, check out AlexanderDolin.com for more activities like these.


Dispute Your Negative Thoughts

This is commonly known as the A-B-C-D Method. It is a popular model in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.

The Acrostic looks like this:
A- Activating event
B- Belief
C- Consequence
D- Dispute your thought

You can use this trick to dispute depression, anxiety, disappointment or any other thought that you do not like. For many people this activity takes just a few minutes but for some situations, this activity be a longer process.

Begin practicing talking back to the negative thought that is bothering or hurting you.

A is the Activating event; what happened B is the Belief or the thought that you are having; that is, what you tell yourself about what is happening C is the Consequence of your thought; that is, the feeling you have as a result of your thought D is the way in which you Dispute or talk back to your thought (this means that you challenge negative thoughts and generate alternate positive thoughts)

Here is an example of this:

A. You are single. You were recently dumped by your significant other. (This is a fact.)
B. You think that you cannot be happy without a significant other.
C. The consequences of this thought is that you hopelessly romantic or desperately seeking another companion. The consequence could be slight depression or just a lot of anxiety over this area in your life.
D. Ways to dispute this thought:
"There are a lot of single people who are as happy as those who are in a relationship or married."
"Singleness is a new chapter or season in my life, a time to enjoy the freedom and learn more things about myself and the people in my social circle."
"Being single is unfortunate, but many human beings are single. Human
beings can lead satisfying lives even when single. I am a human being,
therefore I can lead a satisfying life even though I am single."
"There are many other singles in the world. There is someone out there for me. I have had some success in relationships in the past, so I can have future success in my future relationships."

This is just one example of how this model works. If you liked this activity, check out more activities and ideas at alexanderdolin.com